Jack in the Box tacos vs Burger King tacos. Which are better? Does it matter? Does anything matter? A review.

Alright, so Burger King recently came out with a new taco to further push the boundaries of what foods we’ll eat if it’s convenient enough. But, they’re not alone in this space. Jack in the Box has served tacos since the 1950’s, so I don’t think Burger King should be able to come in with their beautiful abomination without squaring off against the original taco-bominations (TM me) from Jack in the Box.

They’re both hard shell tacos. Both deep-fried. Both barely food. Both fast food tacos just trying to make it in a world full of naysayers. (One notable difference: Jack in the Box tacos are made with meat?, lettuce, taco sauce, and a slice of cheese (lol), while Burger King tacos are made with meat?, lettuce, taco sauce, and shredded cheese.)

And now, for the catch. Because Jack in the Box tacos come in twos, I obviously have to get two Burger King tacos. But a normal 2 vs. 2 would just be boring. So here’s what I’m going to do. When I order at each restaurant, I’m going to eat the first taco immediately to get a fresh taste. The 2nd taco, I’m going to save for a half hour later to eat it in the lukewarm state it deserves. Here we go. Burger King up first.

The Burger King taco is at least pretending to try. You can see the meat. The lettuce is…lettuce. And the taco sauce tastes pretty much like the stuff you get at the grocery store. I don’t know, I kinda like it. Jack, what do you got?

Jack in the Box doesn’t even care that their tacos aren’t all meat. Remember when Taco Bell was like, “No! Our tacos are 100% meat, we swear!”? Well, Jack in the Box is like, “You knew what this was.” But, with that said, I once read the perfect encapsulation of what Jack in the Box tacos are, which I’ll repeat right here. (I wish I could give credit for this anecdote, but I can’t remember where I read it, and a Google search was no help). It went something like this, “I went to go get my first Jack in the Box tacos the other day because everyone was telling me I HAD to try them. So I ordered them, pulled one out of the bag, took a bite, and threw it back in the bag, disgusted. Within 5 minutes I finished both tacos and wanted to order more.”

I have no idea why or how they have this effect, but that anecdote is 100% accurate. You will be disgusted by them at first, but you will finish them, and you will want more.

At this stage I’ll say the Burger King taco was a closer approximation to a real taco, and the Jack in the Box tacos were food. Overall, the tacos were not sitting well. But maybe I was missing the point. So I took a walk to allow the tacos the requisite time to reach their lukewarm destiny.

What was I doing? What was the purpose of this? What was the purpose of any of this? Fast food burger places selling tacos. Fake tacos. But were they any more fake than any other fast food taco? Were they frauds masquerading as the real thing? Or were they just doing their best to get through life, faking it until they made it, just like the rest of us?

I sat for hours (5 minutes) staring off into the distance, trying to find meaning while digesting my thoughts slash tacos. But like a lot of life’s beautiful mysteries, I couldn’t quite solve these enigmas. So I headed back to my car to finish my journey.

The lukewarm Jack in the Box taco was a soggy, disgusting, and beautiful mess, while the Burger King taco held it together much better. But I could tell it was still sad and lonely on the inside. Two lost souls, giving it their all in a world that just wants to write them off. Ya know what? It’s okay that neither one is truly great. They’re beautiful for what they are. And so are we. I love you, shitty fast food tacos. 

Jack in the Box Tacos vs. Burger King Tacos : 5/5 Therapy Sessions.

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